I struggle with enjoying happiness.
This may sound totally weird to some of you but I’m hoping to try and explain my thoughts.
Last night I went down to a local bar to meet some friends from my meetup group. I had one small glass of wine and lots of good conversation. When I came home I had so much energy, I was literally buzzing. It could have been the wine but I doubt it as I really did only have one glass over a long period of time. When I got in I found myself singing along to some music and doing a bit of cleaning.
Then suddenly I stopped.
I began to really panic that I was getting manically high. I could no longer enjoy the happy buzz I had.
Now in all reality I wasn’t too up as usually when that happens it goes on and on and I can’t just stop myself like I did last night. However, it means I seem to no longer be able to enjoy the happy moments. I was happy, just happy, not high or manic but it caused me to panic.
Does anyone else with bipolar have these feelings? Any tips on learning to enjoy happiness again?